WHITE v. GREEN TEAM MONDAY NIGHT
The first FC Denver indoor derby is scheduled for Monday evening at 7:30pm. This clash of titans will feature the Green Team, run by Stephen Harries, and the White Team, led by Chris Lobkovich. The Green Army was lucky enough to get a few comments from the two coaches.
The White Team is the newest member of the FC Denver family and have been making a great deal of progress over the past months. Chris, now known only as the “Ninja Assassin”, is preparing his men for this classic battle. When asked about his opponents and what measures he is taking in preparation from this battle, the Ninja Assassin responded by saying:
“I have the utmost respect for Stephen Harries. He’s a truly gifted coach and great leader of men. Unfortunately the FC Denver Green team is a little short on men this season, so we’ll see what school girls he brings to the game”
The Green Team showed that they are more than man enough to rise up to any challenge last season. The Green Team had a rough start to last season’s indoor league, but managed to fight their way to the championship game. Coach Harries had this to say about the upcoming match:
“It will be a very competitive and open game, White got off to a good start on Monday night with a lucky win, and we made a small slip up in our opening game. My guys will come back with a vengeance against anyone who stands in our way.”
Coach Harries feels a little bad for his opponents. Harries is predicting the complete and utter destruction of the White team. Not only does he believe that the Green Team is superior on the field, but he also believes that the White Team is lacking a qualified coach. I asked him what he thought about the Ninja Assassin. Coach Harries responded by saying:
“Who??? . . . Oh you mean that really un-athletic goofy looking guy that plays defense and runs around the field kicking people in the shin. I thought his name was Eric Fulton.”
The confusion is understandable but after a few hints he finally remembered the Ninja Assassin. Being the generous and kind individual that he is, Coach Harries offered to “show White how to play the beautiful game.”
No one can question the Green Team’s confidence and quality. But there are still a few questions marks regarding Coach Harries.
The Ninja Assassin has added a new level of controversy to this match requesting that coach Harries “produce his green card before stepping onto the pitch.”
Apparently there are some questions regarding Coach Harries citizenship. A government official has made this statement to fuel suspisions over Coach Harries status:
“INS was tipped off and are going to raid an adult rec league soccer game…… Rumours of an illegal Welshman and Italian man cohorting together to play soccer like a bunch of nancies are at the Department of Homeland Securities most wanted list….”
Coach Harries is probably the least of the Ninja Assassin’s problems. Not only does the Green Team host a number of talented players, but also one of the most colorful characters in the game, Vino Lino Vitale. The eccentric Italian is more than a hard nosed defender, he is also the spirit of the team. The Ninja Assassin had this to say about the Green Team’s talismanic captain:
“He’s old . . . and slow.”
The interview concluded with a few candid remarks from the two coaches. Coach Harries conceded that the White Team isn’t a team that can be taken lightly. He has nothing but respect for the White Team and the Ninja Assassin, and his comments were all in good fun. The Ninja Assassin said that he is honored to be on the same field as the Green Team. This match will let the White Team know how far they’ve actually progressed.
In closing the coaches had this to say:
Coach Harries: “I wish the White Team luck and I truely believe that the White has the courage and will power to bounce back after we beat the shit out of them.”
Coach Ninja Assassin: “It should be a fantastic game between two very capable squads. It will be interesting to see if the potent offense of the FC Denver Green team will be able to break through the stifling defense of the FC Denver White team.” The Ninja Assassin also added, “but seriously, we are going to kick their monkey ass . . . Coach Harries needs to buy some looser fitting pants and cut his hair . . . USA bitches!!!!”
February 13th, 2009 at 3:01 pm
And the winner is………………………
FC DENVER GREEN!!!
As expected (and predicted by coach Harries) it was a true ass-whoopin’ for the white team. 5-1 (that 1 goal was just to be polite)
Coach Harries will not cut his hair, vino lino will continue being old and slow and dick will always be a dick…..
Forza Verdi!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
June 30th, 2009 at 12:39 pm
interesting post, will come back here, bookmarked your site